“We resist transition not because we can’t accept the change, but because we can’t accept letting go of that piece of ourselves that we have to give up when and because the situation has changed.”
When my landlord announced that he was turning our apartment into AirBnBs and we had to move out within two months, I pretended I was so cool with it. Then I promptly marched up the stairs and put up more photos and frames. I moved four times last year. I lived in two suitcases for eight months. I. Don’t. Want. To. What am I learning about this? I was feeling grief- reminded of last year and my life in DC and all the folks that are in my heart and in a different place. I’m grieving watching my roommate move into the next level of her life (marriage and cohabitation). I’m grieving this gorgeous house near Lake of the Isles that has held me and supported me in the new root system I am growing. The piece of myself that has found love and companionship, and a home here. That has to let the friendships change. This piece of myself that is going to grow in new ways. I like her, I love her and I am having to let her go. With great resistance and clinging and waves of tears and a major haircut.
MANTRA: May I pause long enough at the shores of this ending to appreciate all the things that I am loving here. May I open to the newness that I can’t see clearly yet and embrace the unknown gifts that it’s bringing. May I trust the grief, the raw, the sadness as the love that was present and learn to surf this wave without drowning.
JOURNAL: What is in transition in your life? How are you letting go of what was? What are you letting go of?
These Soulful Sunday blogs go out weekly on Sundays to be used as a place to step back from the hustle and bustle and explore what your soul might be saying to you. Some folks use these as journal prompts and let loose amidst pages. Some folks bring them to the kitchen table and jam over coffee. Do you, boo.