“Your body for as long as it possibly can, will be faithful to living. That’s what it does.” – Matthew Sanford
I got a breast reduction at 24 and suffered from body dysmorphia for the next two years that led to a binging relationship with food. I felt underwater, often drowning in waves of anger followed by depression and then numbness in my body. I tried to defy its needs. Once, I ate an uncomfortable amount of chocolate covered almonds and then went for a 17 mile run. Don’t try that one at home, folks. At the time, it was a moment of surrender. All of my insides were churning, my muscles were screaming for me to stop, and my monkey mind was rampant: You can’t finish this run, you’ll never be able to complete a marathon. You’re a failure. Yet, my body kept chugging away. It was going to let me know it was unhappy, but it was there. I remember thinking, Alright, Body. I get it. We’re here together. I’m going to figure out how to love you better, how to be in you without trying to get rid of you.
Your body’s here, speaking to you all the time. It is our work to tune into the body, to learn to listen to the way it speaks. Perhaps it is the greatest act of faith and love we could have.
Our relationships to our bodies is deeply important to me. Will you share about how your relationship with your body has morphed and changed throughout the years?
These Soulful Sunday blogs go out weekly on Sundays to be used as a place to step back from the hustle and bustle and explore what your soul might be saying to you. Some folks use these as journal prompts and let loose amidst pages. Some folks bring them to the kitchen table and jam over coffee. Do you, boo.